Saturday, August 6, 2011

~累~



凌晨一点多,要两点了
今天是星期六,
难得回到家,其实我很想好好休息.....
我真的很累......
人好累,心也好累....
又一次,我不知道自己怎么了....
跟我熟悉的人都知道我是爱哭鬼,
但你知道吗?
这个爱哭鬼好久好久都没体会到什么是伤心了....


时间不够用~
我分不了身....
家人,情人,伙伴,朋友,网络,鼓团.......
太多太多东西等着我去做
我放不下任何一样.....

其实我很想哭....
但现在,我好像就只会笑
会哭,都是在晚上一个人在家的时候.....
这种哭法,不可悲吗?
我不喜欢.....
没有肩膀,没有安慰
满脑都是烦恼~


前几天弄伤了自己的手
我没有哭,甚至还能笑.....
后来才发觉,
流血,受伤又怎样.....
我不怕,真的不怕
我只是斗不过这挫折......
我怕的是会难倒我的事
你总是说我很高傲,很自大
也许有一点
我认为自己很厉害
所以我讨厌我做不了的事
你知道吗....
手指很痛,我不哭
但过后看着自己的手,
有多少次,有多少样,
因为它而我做不到的事情.....
我恨,
连换一件衣都难的时候,
连要绑个头发都很难的时候,
连要用力打鼓都不能的时候.....

有三天了吧....
我已经三天没好好洗澡了.....
一只手,
原来真的不能失去另一只....
我什么也做不了....
好失败,好沮丧~

又是很忙的周末,
回了家,可是没见上爸妈几眼
鼓啊,
你就是那么能牵动我的心....
忙着练习,
加上明早要教鼓,星期天要去瑜伽课程,然后赶回马六甲....
我真的好累好压力....
可是我放不开,放不下任何一样....
为什么我什么都做不好....
鼓打不好,
自己照顾不好,
瑜伽学不好,
东西做不好......

能不能....
能不能 给我多点时间,
多点力量,
多点快乐......
让我天天都笑得很开心,
什么事都做得很好,
然后过的很满足......















<"Fish))<
06 August 2011 @ 1.45am

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

~MisfortunE~


It was an unlucky day....I guess....
I accidentally cut my finger yesterday with the most sharp chef knife or what we called French knife~ ><
Haiz....I felt shock when I knew that my finger was be in touch with the blade!!! omg~
I have no idea why this could happen....God bless~

Lets explain what had happen that time....xD
I was cooking chicken curry that time...
After all de vege had cooked, I pour the curry powder into the pot....
Hmmm.....tasted not spicy enuf!!!
Chili powder's turn~~
I cut the packages of the chili powder using the big chef knife~ haha xD
At this point, my forefinger touched de blade~ lolz
I try to make it stop bleeding by cover it with my hand towel....
After bout 20 minutes, I opened de towel and have a look on my wound....
Yucks....still bleeding~~ WT...... ==
My roommate and housemate were trying to help me (even they felt afraid) haha xD
but then nothing can be done....Im still bleeding~
I covered again my wound with the towel and went to the clinic~
Ishhhh....you know what, I walked to the clinic!!!
The guys had gone out and there was no car at home~ *faint* ==


Doctor frown while looking at my finger....
He advised me to let him sew on my wound~ ==
Okay....frankly, I'm scare~ but what to do....I juz want my finger to stop bleeding!!!
Started with two injection of Anesthetic on my little poor finger~ sob sob~ T.T
What I felt was only PAIN! ><
When the doctor started to sew on my wound,
Yeppy~ there was no any feelings on my finger anymore~ haha xD
There was all blood on the doctor's rubber gloves, my hand and of coz, the operating table~
Hoho~ two sewing needles on my finger~ but it was still bleeding~ ><
The doctor took my finger up and I saw distressed on his face~ haha
He then plan to sew again~ the 3rd sew on my finger~ lolz
I'm wondering, will there be any scar on my pretty cute forefinger after it recover?? o.O
After the 3rd sew, doctor was making a wound dressing on my finger~
Yeah~ it was pretty~ xD
I thought all the process had been done~
I was about to stand up and leave....
by the same time, doctor called me and I saw a big syringe on his hand~
Shit~ another injection again....but this time, it drops on my right arm~ ><
Everything done and I leave the operating room.......
with excitement~ haha xD


I started to call my dear when I reached home and also my mum!!!^^
Guess what, a girl like me will desire of LOVE, CARE and SYMPATHY as well when I feel weak~ =D
I like to hear the sound of people that are worry bout me~
Frankly, I'm ok~ Fine enough... xD
Luckily the doctor was pretty friendly and patient~
He tried to chat with me to divert my attention while operation is going on....
He tried to make some jokes to chase away my fear....
and he praise me as well~ he said that I'm brave! haha....
of coz I am! I'm tough enough~ v(^.^)v
So, this is the story of mine~ The Misfortune~ =P











<"Fish))<
03 August 2011 @ 12.30pm